There are many questions that I don't like being asked, whether they're mildly annoying or just a gigantic PITA. Usually, I don't like the person asking them either. Or if I liked them before, I don't anymore...
1. What is your name/address/phone number?
Practically all Indians are familiar with this routine. Aunty or uncle is meeting me for the first time and thus begins the barrage of questions. Inane ones like what is the name of my school or the spelling of my sister's name. It's always the same list. Enough already! No one ever asked me what books I liked to read or what games I liked to play..as if 5 year olds don't read. Or play.
2. Do you like mummy or daddy?
I've heard this one asked innumerable times. Just what do you hope to achieve with it? At most, it might cause a slight embarrassment to the parent who is apparently 'liked less'. So what? I'm just as likely to say I love my mom because daddy wouldn't take me to the library or that I love daddy coz mummy scolded me yesterday.
3. What do you want to be when you grow up?
God forbid you answer is that you want to be an astronaut or travel the world. Clearly everyone knows you're supposed to say engineer or doctor or something. I'm a 10 year old kid, do you really think I'm planning my career like some IIT/IAS hopefuls?
4. Which college are you applying for?
This one is a corollary to the previous question. Normally I'd say this is a perfectly normal question to ask a teen. But the expected answer is what infuriates me. It doesn't matter what subject you're interested in or what you are looking for in a college. You're supposed to say that you want to get into the best engg/medical college in the state, period.
5. What is your caste/religion?
I cannot, for the life of me, imagine a situation where an answer to this question is really necessary. Unless you are taking the census or something like that, you have no business asking me that. Are you going to decide whether you like me or not based on this question? The worst time I've been asked this was at my old job. A much older colleague (though he was my junior) warned me to stay away from some of the other employees because 'they're low caste see?' Asshole.
6. What is your salary?
Once upon a time, this question was only asked of men. But now our egalitarian society asks the money making potential of both men and women. Why does this upset me so much? For one thing, it is none of your damn business! Apparently the worth of a human being can be summed up with just one figure: salary. Unless you reply that you're working at Microsoft/Infosys/Wipro with 10/12 lakhs pa, you are automatically deemed second rate. And inevitably, it is followed by the next question...
7. When are you getting married?
Unfortunately this question is still asked more frequently of women. As if that is the ultimate goal of every girl in existence. The old aunties are the worst, probably. Beware their wrath/angst if you say not yet or you haven't found anyone! They'll go on and on about "get married soon, your parents want to get their responsibilities over with" and "they're also getting old" etc...Really, I'm supposed to marry any Tom, Dick or Harry that comes along simply because my parents are getting old?! And note that it isn't even my parents who feel like I'm a burden, it is just automatically assumed that an unmarried girl in her 20s is a burden on her parents. Of course, they would like nothing more than to shift that onto someone else's head!
8. You're still not engaged? Your uncle's sister-in-law's second daughter is already married. And she's 2 years younger than you!
Hey just because someone else is so keen to wreck her life, should I do the same? Sometimes I think Indians consider marriage to be some sort of a race. It's not important who you marry, just that you get married 'at the right time', as decided by someone else. Sometimes, some random relative will nudge you and ask in a whisper "Do you have a boyfriend?" Yes, the reason I'm taking so long to get married is because I have a boyfriend hidden somewhere...Even if I did, why would you think I'll tell you instead of my parents anyway?
9. When are you having a baby?
Sigh. Did you think that the obnoxious questions would stop once you get married? It is assumed that once you get married, the next step is making babies. Every girl has two aims in life: get married and have kids, didn't you know? The ridiculous part is that when I tell anyone that I'm not planning one yet, their next question is: "What are you waiting for?!" Their flawless logic being that I've been married for x years and I'm not getting any younger...*shakes my head*
10. Are you hoping for a boy?
This last one is something that I cannot believe people still ask in the 21st century. I mean really? Having a child is a big responsibility. Pregnancy itself is a considerable risk to the health of a woman and there are so many things that could go wrong. Yet, the biggest consideration is "What if it's a girl?!" God forbid! I admit, no one has actually asked me that question (they probably know me well enough, besides I'm not pregnant yet!) but I've heard it being asked. Some relative once told my mother in front of me (when he found out she has 2 daughters) "It must be such a loss for you!" The nerve of some people...
This is just my shortlist. What are your pet peeves?
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| I would have said mythology! |
Practically all Indians are familiar with this routine. Aunty or uncle is meeting me for the first time and thus begins the barrage of questions. Inane ones like what is the name of my school or the spelling of my sister's name. It's always the same list. Enough already! No one ever asked me what books I liked to read or what games I liked to play..as if 5 year olds don't read. Or play.
2. Do you like mummy or daddy?
I've heard this one asked innumerable times. Just what do you hope to achieve with it? At most, it might cause a slight embarrassment to the parent who is apparently 'liked less'. So what? I'm just as likely to say I love my mom because daddy wouldn't take me to the library or that I love daddy coz mummy scolded me yesterday.
 |
| I want to be an artist! |
God forbid you answer is that you want to be an astronaut or travel the world. Clearly everyone knows you're supposed to say engineer or doctor or something. I'm a 10 year old kid, do you really think I'm planning my career like some IIT/IAS hopefuls?
4. Which college are you applying for?
This one is a corollary to the previous question. Normally I'd say this is a perfectly normal question to ask a teen. But the expected answer is what infuriates me. It doesn't matter what subject you're interested in or what you are looking for in a college. You're supposed to say that you want to get into the best engg/medical college in the state, period.
5. What is your caste/religion?
I cannot, for the life of me, imagine a situation where an answer to this question is really necessary. Unless you are taking the census or something like that, you have no business asking me that. Are you going to decide whether you like me or not based on this question? The worst time I've been asked this was at my old job. A much older colleague (though he was my junior) warned me to stay away from some of the other employees because 'they're low caste see?' Asshole.
Once upon a time, this question was only asked of men. But now our egalitarian society asks the money making potential of both men and women. Why does this upset me so much? For one thing, it is none of your damn business! Apparently the worth of a human being can be summed up with just one figure: salary. Unless you reply that you're working at Microsoft/Infosys/Wipro with 10/12 lakhs pa, you are automatically deemed second rate. And inevitably, it is followed by the next question...
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| Also, I hate this look! |
Unfortunately this question is still asked more frequently of women. As if that is the ultimate goal of every girl in existence. The old aunties are the worst, probably. Beware their wrath/angst if you say not yet or you haven't found anyone! They'll go on and on about "get married soon, your parents want to get their responsibilities over with" and "they're also getting old" etc...Really, I'm supposed to marry any Tom, Dick or Harry that comes along simply because my parents are getting old?! And note that it isn't even my parents who feel like I'm a burden, it is just automatically assumed that an unmarried girl in her 20s is a burden on her parents. Of course, they would like nothing more than to shift that onto someone else's head!
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| The only reason to get married |
Hey just because someone else is so keen to wreck her life, should I do the same? Sometimes I think Indians consider marriage to be some sort of a race. It's not important who you marry, just that you get married 'at the right time', as decided by someone else. Sometimes, some random relative will nudge you and ask in a whisper "Do you have a boyfriend?" Yes, the reason I'm taking so long to get married is because I have a boyfriend hidden somewhere...Even if I did, why would you think I'll tell you instead of my parents anyway?
 |
| More babies!!! |
Sigh. Did you think that the obnoxious questions would stop once you get married? It is assumed that once you get married, the next step is making babies. Every girl has two aims in life: get married and have kids, didn't you know? The ridiculous part is that when I tell anyone that I'm not planning one yet, their next question is: "What are you waiting for?!" Their flawless logic being that I've been married for x years and I'm not getting any younger...*shakes my head*
10. Are you hoping for a boy?
This last one is something that I cannot believe people still ask in the 21st century. I mean really? Having a child is a big responsibility. Pregnancy itself is a considerable risk to the health of a woman and there are so many things that could go wrong. Yet, the biggest consideration is "What if it's a girl?!" God forbid! I admit, no one has actually asked me that question (they probably know me well enough, besides I'm not pregnant yet!) but I've heard it being asked. Some relative once told my mother in front of me (when he found out she has 2 daughters) "It must be such a loss for you!" The nerve of some people...
This is just my shortlist. What are your pet peeves?
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