Skip to main content

On Being A Housewife

Being a housewife is the best thing in the world. Or so they told me. Growing up, most if not all, of the women in my life were housewives. That was a very long time ago, back when housewife hadn't yet acquired its present unsavory reputation. At least I presume unsavory, why else would women refer to themselves as Stay At Home Moms (SAHMs)? 

I never quite understood why a housewife was called that though. I know what idea it was supposed to convey, that of a married woman who looks after the home and its constituents, but it didn't make much sense. Men are given titles showing what work they do - not always though, I'm pretty fuzzy on what a VP of social media marketing does exactly, other than tweet all day long (sweet job!). And even when they do no work, they have fancy pants titles after their names. Given that, I always thought a better term for these women would be President of Everything

Because that was exactly what they did. Everything. Wake up the kids and husband, make sure everyone is on schedule, supervise the maid, serve tea/coffee to whoever wants a cup, make breakfast, pack lunch boxes (cannot have the same food made for breakfast can we?), pray to god in elaborate rituals, clean the house, get the laundry done, help the neighbor and by that time, the kids are home from school. 

Serve them lunch, make snacks for the evening, help them with homework till the husband comes home, then serve dinner for the entire family with special tiffin for the grandparents. And this is just a regular day, without any extraordinary events such as the maid taking a holiday or quitting, the children screaming because they forgot something, the vegetable vendor doesn't turn up, the power fails or one of the appliances decides to up and stop working mysteriously.

Most men have a 9 to 5 job, plus about an hour for traveling. Most housewives on the other hand, have a 5 am to 10 pm (roughly) work day. I never quite saw the appeal, though many women I know swear it's the best gig in the world. Sure, if you have no dreams of your own. Or your dreams only involve having children and taking care of them. I promised myself I'd never be just a housewife.

How things change! Having married recently and unable to work due to visa issues, I am also a housewife. And I feel like I'm on vacation. No boss, no schedules, no in-laws, no kids, no maid, no neighbor, no politics and I have all the time in the world to do things I haven't had time for before. Like play video games. Read books by the dozen. Write. Learning to cook. Go biking. Learn to swim. Learn to code. It's perfect - for now. Later it'll be time to work on achieving my dreams. Which is finding a job which lets me do all of those things :D

Ahem. Let me try that again. Being a housewife is the best thing in the world. Unless your dream is not to be one!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Why Don’t We Raise Our Sons like We Do Our Daughters?

This post originally appeard in Women's Web: Why Don’t We Raise Our Sons like We Do Our Daughters? One of the hot button topics right now in Indian media is the safety of women – or rather how our country doesn't really care about half its population. From rape, sexual assault, harassment (in streets, public transport, nearly every public place) to violence perpetrated on women, Indians are finally getting around to discussing taboo topics. One refrain that caught my eye throughout these debates – both online and off – is the fact that the reaction of the majority of Indians is the same: girls should stay at home, not go out after dark, dress appropriately and so on if they want to stay safe. No one seems to bat an eyelid when laying down these precautions for women. Except that the reality is women would be far safer if all the men simply DID NOT RAPE or HARASS any person that looks remotely female. No one has to stay at home and become a hermit! That got me th...

Arranged Versus Love Marriage

This post originally appeared in Women's Web:  Arranged Versus Love Marriage: Here's Why Things Are Changing In 21st-century India, change is so rapid that we barely have time to get used to something before some new trend is on the horizon. And I'm not just talking about technology here. Whether it is human behavior, relationships, societal or cultural norms, Indian society – along with the rest of the world – today is hardly recognizable to my parents or their parents. It's not a surprise that the institution of marriage and the process of finding a life partner is also undergoing a metamorphosis. Perhaps this is one of the areas where the gap between generations is the most obvious. Almost every day, there is a TV show or media report or blog post talking about arranged vs. love marriages. So I figured I would present my take on it as well! Whenever anyone talks about arranged versus love marriages - I don't know why they are always portrayed as opposing ...

One Step Up

Radha Radha knew that Lakshmi was eyeing her sari, though no expression showed on her face. All the maids thought she was arrogant for not talking to them but Radha had never been one of those people who thought her caste made her a better person. It had just been easier not to talk to anyone when she had first come to the city. Besides, these maids never had anything much to talk about except gossip and no one knew better than her how much damage could be caused when women gossiped! It was gossip that made her believe in Chandrasekhar. That he was a famous author, pretending to be a wastrel and swindler for his latest novel. He had been so charming, she had fallen for him completely. Her parents had died when she was 13 and she had always wanted someone to take care of her. She had been so happy. Until the day she woke up to find that he had disappeared and her house sold without her knowledge. He had turned out to be a swindler, pretending to be a famous author. She had been l...